Imbalanced

Update: I'm probably not going to Austin this weekend, and here's why: Vanessa. Apparently, I don't have to drive 8 hours to get my head on straight, I just have to call my friend. After about 30 seconds of listening to me, Vanessa, sorted things out for me. Soooo, I'm still upset about Andrew's death. It's an unexpected discovery, but very true. I guess knowledge is key. Now that I know I'm subconsiouslly thinking about him, I can defend some of my actions and moods... Thanks Jaaaanessa! I love you!


It's amazing how quickly my life can get off course; which is the main reason I haven't posted anything recently. Lately my life's foundation has been insecure, at best. When one area of my life is shaken it knocks everything else off kilter (from my fingernails being too long to messy relationships). Why has January been such a stinker? Well, for starters, January's are usually epic for me and not in the good way. I thought back over the last four years, specifically January 19th, which, about three years ago was the day I found out some very disturbing news. With the onset of that information January has been tough ever since. Not to mention that this year, January has been plagued with death.

Well, today is the day it will all end. Yes, I know January isn't over, but it's for me.

1) I will send my February rent today (hope it doesn't get there late)
2) I will workout
3) I will clean. Cleaning always jump start my internal cleaning, which helps lead to a more balanced me.
4) I will try and smile.
5) I will write
6) Study
7) Work
8) Walk my dog
9) Cook something good for me
10) Plan a trip

Today, will be better... Balance is a funny thing. For me, it's an active muscle that needs to be toned and sharpened. It needs the correct nutrients and sometimes a good tan. I think my balance is lacking some Vitamin D, and I might know just where to get it... Austin.... Texas that is. I don't know anyone cute named Austin.